Blog-tember: How Do You De-Stress/Take Care of Yourself?

Truth: I am the type of person who puts other peoples’ needs in front of my own.
Truth: There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Truth: Over the past year I realized I haven’t been taking care of myself and once I got back into yoga, I learned the importance of self-care.

Initially, I struggled with the concept of self-care for a while because I have a hard time thinking of myself first, it seems selfish to me. But then I realized it’s the intentions behind what you’re doing that makes something self-centered (or selfish) vs. self-care. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines self-centered as “concerned solely with one’s own desires, needs, or interests” and that’s not what self-care is.

The Blissful Mind defines self-care as,

activities and practices we engage in on a regular basis to reduce stress and enhance our well-being

I’m learning I can’t fully show up for others if my battery isn’t fully charged or my cup isn’t full (to quote popular sayings when describing self-care). Through this process I’ve learned about some of the different dimensions of self-care so I split my list up into the different ways I de-stress as well as the different ways I practice self-care (and you’ll find some of these things overlap!).

How I De-Stress

Have a margarita at the end of the day (if margs are not an option, a glass of wine)
Eat something I love: Even if it isn’t the “most healthy” option (like Mexican food, pizza, chocolate, etc.)
Do a brain dump: Sometimes it helps see everything I’m stressing about written down so I can start to decide what top priorities are
Watch an episode of something I love: Usually Parks & Recreation because it makes me laugh but also Law & Order: SVU or whatever show I’m currently into
Take a bath with my favorite bath bombs: I recommend literally anything from Lush
Go for a walk: Sometimes stepping away from whatever I’m working on and taking a five minute walk is the best way to reset my mind
Dance it out: Thank you for this one, Grey’s Anatomy (see also, this scene because FEELS). I have a “Dance It Out” playlist on Spotify that I listen to when I need a boost!

Ways I Practice Self-Care

Treat Yo Self: Treating yourself every once in a while (not excessively) is a great way to practice self-care. Get a mani/pedi or massage, buy a beautiful new candle or indulge in dessert
Get away from screens: Read instead or get outside
Journal: Whether that’s art journaling or writing in a journal, express yourself in a safe place
Yoga: This is also a way I de-stress but getting on my mat and moving my body always makes me feel better
Meditate: There are awesome apps for meditation (I mentioned my favorite here) or even googling “guided meditations” pulls up great results
Daily affirmations: Recently I’ve been starting my day by writing down a few affirmations to meditate on and focus on throughout the day. Rachel from #dreamcreatedo has awesome lists of affirmations on her blog! (See here, here & here)
Get cozy: I love putting on yoga pants + a comfy t-shirt and wrapping up in my softest blanket.
Talk to a loved one: Meet up to talk face to face or call someone you trust (98% of the time, I call my mom).
Go to bed early: Sometimes embracing #grandmastatus is the best way to take care of yourself.
Say no: If you don’t want to do something, say no. (Still working on this myself)
Listen to favorite music: That album/artist/playlist that always makes you feel better? Put that on.

What are some ways you de-stress and practice self-care? I hope these lists help inspire you to practice self-care this weekend, you deserve it!

Blog-tember: 5 Things That Bring Me Joy

I’ve never joined a link up before BUT after hearing about this from Rachel and checking out the list of prompts (a little late), I decided to join in for a few.

So, even though I am officially seven days late, here is my first post for Blog-tember 2016.

5 Things That Bring Me Joy

The ocean: Specifically, the Outer Banks. I am that cliche girl who is obsessed with the beach/ocean. I could write about the ocean for forever. I could go on and on about the healing I’ve found in its salty waters. The Outer Banks has a special place in my heart because that’s the beach I grew up at and that’s where my family’s beach house is located.
Music: I love how passionate artists are. I love being able to hear music. I love being able to read music. I love being able to participate in music by singing or playing piano. I love how music can easily bring people together. I love the experience of live music, especially the joy that comes with seeing your favorite band perform live (even if it is the 15th time you’ve seen them live).
Dogs: I’ve never had a dog but the joy I’ve received from other people’s dogs is insane. I’m particularly obsessed with pugs, but all dogs bring me joy. Sometimes I don’t think humans deserve dogs because they’re so good to us. (Also, dog memes)
Laughter: Specifically, uncontrollable laughter that makes you cry and your abs ache. True, wild laughter is the best kind. I love watching people experience this and I absolutely love losing myself to laughter.
Yoga: Joy is just one of the benefits I get from moving my body with my breath.

I found this prompt to be surprisingly challenging! In the sense that once I got started talking writing about the things that bring me joy, I found it hard to stop and keep the limit of five. This seems like something I should start practicing at least once a day to help cultivate joy & gratitude on a daily basis!

What are five things that bring you joy?

Click here to link back to the 2016 Blog-tember Challenge!

September Goals

Lately, a lot of people have been asking about my goals and how I’m working towards those goals. I’ve been searching for ways to write everything down and keep myself accountable, but have noticed a lot of bloggers post about their monthly/yearly goals as a good way to keep themselves accountable.

In college, instead of doing a New Year’s Resolution, which I generally dislike and don’t necessarily agree with, I did monthly goals instead. The only problem was at the time, I wasn’t breaking my monthly goals up into smaller weekly goals, so I often got overwhelmed by everything I said I wanted to do and never actually did anything. This time, I’m going to create monthly goals and then each week break those down into weekly goals with daily tasks to help complete them. That way, at the end of the month I’m not looking back and kicking myself for not completing or making progress towards goals I had set for myself.

So with that being said, here we go with September.

Slowing down: Recently, I’ve felt the need to rush. Let me rush through my inbox to get through all my emails, let me rush through a yoga practice so it can be said and done, let me rush through the grocery store because I hate grocery shopping. I’m rushing everywhere I go trying to cram as many things and events into one day and then at the end of the day I feel scatterbrained and only really accomplished one or two things. Some days, I actually feel out of breath, as if I’ve been literally running from one thing to the next. I haven’t, but in all my rushing and multitasking I’ve forgotten to be mindful of my breathing. Literally rushing, like if I’m running behind or am actually late, also just generally puts me in a shitty mood and there’s an easy solution to that problem- slow down. So for September, I’m going to focus on slowing down. This primarily means I’m going to focus on the task at hand or whatever I’m doing and not try and do five other things at the same time. I’ve been a proponent of multitasking for a long time, but it stresses me out, so I’m going to focus on one thing at a time. This will also help me be more productive.
Track my time: To help with slowing down, I’m going to be tracking my time. For work, I use toggl to track how long I’m spending on certain projects. This can also be used in my actual life when I’m on my computer to track how long I’m spending doing various activities. I’ve also been looking for an app for my phone that would track how long I spend on my phone and track my app usage and just downloaded the Moment app today!
Break up with the snooze button: I have been in a very serious, long-term relationship with the snooze button since high school and I just think we’re at different points in our lives now and we need to move on. I’m always saying “I was a psych major! I’ve read the studies, I know how bad the snooze button is for your body!” and the few days I do wake up without hitting snooze, I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER! This goal also leads to…
Morning routines: The days I hit snooze 10 times and am subsequently running late are the days where my mornings start off rushing and I’m in five different places mentally at once. No more of this. Also no more waking up and immediately checking my email or social media. I want at least 30 minutes of journaling/yoga/meditation time before actually checking my phone.
Get involved in Raleigh community: This means volunteering my time, attending networking events and getting out to some of the awesome festivals/conferences that are happening in Raleigh this month! I’m researching local nonprofits to see which ones I want to get involved with, so stay tuned for more about this!
Eat actual meals: Aka stop eating crap and calling it “dinner.” No, my mother is a dietitian, I know what I should be eating. Also, stop skipping lunch.
#yogaeverydamnday: I hate that my yoga practice has been slipping and I haven’t been as consistent. Doing yoga makes me feel 110% better, always. Even when I’m too tired or too sore from a previous practice. Even when it’s 6 am, I just need to get on my mat. This also applies for meditation. Yes, it’s hard. Yes, it gets frustrating. But yes, I feel better. So at least five minutes of meditation a day!

Friends, help me stay accountable to this! Seriously, text/call/DM/tweet/comment to ask how I’ve been doing with these to help me stay on track! What are some of your September goals?

Weekend Escape: Charleston, SC

Last weekend I had the awesome opportunity to go to Charleston for an easy weekend escape. I had never been to Charleston before but have always heard nothing but amazing things about the city, especially from friends who have moved down there after college.

We stayed about 20 minutes outside of downtown Charleston, which was nice so we were a little farther out from crowds and what not but were still able to easily get into the city to explore. I was surprised to learn how close places like Kiawah Island, Seabrook Island and Folly Beach are to downtown Charleston. Usually when I think of Charleston, I think of the historic downtown area like where Rainbow Row or King Street are, not so much the places like Mount Pleasant or Summerville.

Friday night we went into downtown to explore King Street and eventually decided on a place to eat off Market Street. We stumbled upon an outdoor night market after getting ice cream at Kilwin’s and it was so cute! It kind of reminded me of the flea market since it was mostly art and jewelry.

We turned in early on Friday night because Saturday we got up and left for Kiawah at 8:30! It took about an hour to get to Kiawah which didn’t feel long at all since the drive is so incredibly beautiful. Once we were on the island it took about another 20-30 minutes to get to Ocean Course where Nick and his dad were playing golf. I was so blown away by Kiawah’s beauty by this point, I didn’t know what to expect at Ocean Course. And oh my god was it beautiful.

Let me preface this by saying I haven’t actually been to that many golf courses in my life but Ocean Course is by far the nicest and most beautiful course I have been to. It may be because it’s literally right on the beach and the clubhouse overlooks the ocean, but I was stunned. Initially I assumed the beach wasn’t a public beach, but it turns out it was! And I’m not sure many people knew about it because I basically had a private beach the entire day. It was so beautiful and the actual beach seemed so wide compared to the skinner beaches with dunes I’m used to in the Outer Banks! And the ocean was so warm. It was like I was back in the Caribbean with how warm the water was.

After too much sun, we headed back to Charleston for dinner at Poogan’s Porch. I absolutely love all the southern charm and houses in Charleston and Poogan’s Porch is so adorable. And also, delicious. They were able to make basically any meal on the menu gluten free, so I got the shrimp and grits and it was by far the most delicious shrimp and grits I’ve ever had. I devoured my dinner. After dinner we made our way to Rainbow Row to walk around the historic area and admire the beautiful houses and waterfront!

The only problem with Charleston in August is the unbelievable heat and humidity. I’m sure it doesn’t help that we seem to be stuck in a never-ending heat wave, but man, the humidity in Charleston is unreal. Way worse than Richmond and Raleigh.

But other than that, it is a gorgeous city and we will definitely be back. I can only imagine how nice Charleston is in the fall!

Kathryn G. Flocco

Category: personal